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NZ MUSIC AWARDS 2013

November 25, 2013 by Robin

Araadhna, Best Nz Children's Album, fleaBITE, Flight of the Conchords, George FM, Lorde, NZ Music Awards, Perter Posa, Stan Walker, Tui, Vector Arena, Vodafone

Lucky old me…invited to the NZ MUSIC AWARDS.

As a result of fleaBITE winning the Tui for Best NZ Children’s Album 2013,

I received a lanyard in the mail…my ticket to entry.

The hype on George FM gathered momentum as my friend and I swerved and beeped our way along inner city Auckland streets en route to Vector Arena.

And I emulated Mr Bean, changing daytime garb for something a little less comfortable as we hurtled along.

We knew we were getting close when we encountered throngs of young people, many squashed into a new outfit and teetering in towering heels. Luckily, they were held back by a restraining fence, and we followed in the reflected glory of television celebrities along the reddish carpet for a laugh.

The throngs seemed to have got a better deal inside. They sat in the tiered seating with a great view of the stage, while us VIPs were seated around tables on the ground floor. There were opened beers in buckets on the tables, and finger food of some description…it was too dim to make out what it actually was. Nice thought anyway.

Children’s Music being of supreme importance, we were allocated seats at the table furtherest away from the stage, and shared it with the guys who had done the onscreen graphics for the night’s events. Big screens on either side of the stage gave us a view, and television cameras roamed and swooped on long mechanical arms over the night’s proceedings.

The whole event was very well organised…everything segued smoothly from host patter (Benji Marshall?) to grateful acceptance speeches and performances. The graphics guys said that from their perspective things weren’t going quite as planned, but no one else would notice it.

I have to say, the Silver Scroll Awards (based on the song writers) the previous month were much more to my taste…innovative approaches to songs. While these Vodafone sponsored NZ Music Awards did everything we have come to expect from these glitzy events it felt somehow hollow. This could have been because I was wearing earplugs and sitting right at the back but it was a flashy, poppy affair, not really aimed at me.

I did like the dancing girls dressed in onesie pyjama suits for Araadhna’s song ‘Wake Up’, Stan Walker is a talented home grown lad, I joined the ovation for Lorde and her voluminous Kate Bush-like tresses, and fancy them allowing a woman into the Music Hall of Fame (Shona Laing)!

Lorde with her voluminous Kate Bush-like tresses

The award for irony went to Male Vocalist of the Year James Milne (aka Lawrence Arabia) who said he had watched the event on the telly a few years ago and found it so excruciating that he and his friends were clawing their eyes out, and yet here he was, three years later, accepting the golden Tui.

And who would have thought that Peter Posa would carry off the award for Best Selling Album of the Year…not that many of the assembled youngsters had heard of him. His pre-recorded video acceptance speech showed a white-haired man of 72 twiddling away on his guitar. Long may his royalties flow.

Mr Peter Posa, Best Selling Album 2013

And another surprise… Flight of the Conchords got Best Selling Single for their charity song ‘Feel Inside’ for Cure Kids.

Anyway, congrats to one and all…and didn’t those graphics guys do well!

Gecko Press Interview

October 30, 2013 by Robin

Children's Literature, Gecko Press, interview, Julia Marshall, Kokomai Creative Festival

I recently ran into Julia Marshall, the founder of Gecko Press, at the Kokomai Creative Festival in the Wairarapa. We were both on a panel to talk about the process of creating children’s literature (and music).

Gecko Press is a successful niche publishing house based in Wellington. Currently with 80 titles in print and a slew of awards (including Best Children’s Publisher of the Year in Oceania at the Bologna International Children’s Bookfair 2013), Gecko’s by-line is ‘curiously good children’s books from around the world’.

A car accident on the long, straight main road between the Wairarapa towns delayed the arrival of writer Juliette MacIver. Her husband, a paramedic, was first on the scene, and got on with the real world job of saving lives.

Meanwhile, in the Masterton library, we genteelly sipped cups of tea, sucked lemon drops, and I was delighted to discover that Julia and I shared a quirky, arty approach to creating for children.

Gecko Press…what’s your connection with lizards?

I like geckos in particular – they are cute but not too cute, quick and curious, and they have suction feet. They are also a little shy, I think.

I tend to associate you with things Scandinavian – what is the connection and how did it come about?

I lived in Sweden for 12 years all up, and so many of the early books published by Gecko Press came from Sweden. They still do, but that’s because they do such good books. How I got to live in Sweden goes back to a long bus trip in Nepal and the meeting of a Swedish man: but also my sisters had travelled in Scandinavia, so Sweden was on my radar. I knew it wasn’t Switzerland.

You founded Gecko Press in 2005 …was it scary starting a publishing venture on your own?

At the time not – it is more scary now. Starting is easy…

What was the vision you initially brought, and how have you managed to sustain it?

The vision was always to publish curiously good children’s books; to translate the best writers in the world and bring their books into English: and at the same time, to publish good New Zealand books to send in the other direction. Our mission is to encourage children to love to read.

People say it’s better to have a niche market than try and be all things to all people. Has that ‘smaller’ approach helped you?

Gecko Press is small by choice – I think there are far too many books published in the world. I only want to contribute books I think are worthwhile and will last, rather than quick winners.

Any interesting ‘learning curve’ anecdotes you would like to share?

I asked that same question of a man at Bologna Book Fair before I started: what would he do differently if he was starting again? He said he would get a good distributor and to watch print runs, particularly reprints. That was good advice.

What qualities do you think you have (yes, including charm) that have made Gecko successful?

I think that choosing books that are warm, fun to read over and over, and unusual, has been part of any success we have achieved. We were very lucky that Joy Cowley gave Gecko Press her Snake and Lizard stories to publish – that was a turning point, absolutely. And people have got behind us, wanting us to succeed, and that has been critical.

While a couple of Gecko books per year originate in NZ, the majority are typically publications/translations from authors and illustrators in Europe and Asia. What do you like about the work that comes from these places?

I find that the books from Japan, Sweden, France and Germany often appeal to me – they have a warmth about them, and are child centered, and assume intelligence on the part of the child. I like that. I enjoy a bit of naughtiness in a book

Given that the majority of your writers and illustrators are based overseas, what keeps you based in NZ?

I like living in New Zealand!

Gecko Press seems to aim at the ‘arty’ end of the market…more of a high- end independent bookstore item than Golden Books at the Warehouse. Does this approach bear financial fruit?

Gecko Press does try to publish books pitched at what we call the commercial side of good – we don’t do very well in the Warehouse, sadly. Sometimes the least commercial books will be a success – Duck Death and the Tulip is an example. Other books I thought might be more commercial haven’t been. One never knows…

What advice do you have for anyone wanting to take the plunge and make their arty vision into a sustainable reality?

I would make sure I had a good amount of cash that I was prepared to lose. I would check that people really like the product and are prepared to pay for it: and I would get advice from people especially in weak areas. I would try to build a company with focus and structure. I have been very fortunate to have people prepared to help me.

Toy Tester!

August 28, 2013 by Robin

Best job in the world, interview, Toy Tester

Move over Willy Wonker… in New Zealand the job that every child wants is to be a Toy Tester for The Warehouse. It comes with $200 worth of toys every month, plus a trip to an exotic locale…possibly Disneyland. And no, this isn’t an endorsement.

It is the tale of New Zealand’s youngest official Toy Tester… who I have known since she was knee high to a cupcake.

From an early age it was obvious that Frances Williams was destined for great things, either as a future prime minister, matron of an institution, or possibly the world’s best dominatrix. Now, aged five, she has struck the jackpot, being one of four children (aged between five and nine) to win the coveted job of Toy Tester for the Warehouse.

Thanks to Frances and mother Tess for this expose:

So, how did it all happen?

Frances has just recently learnt how to read. One day in July she went into the Warehouse with her Dad to buy some winter thermals, and read a poster in the toy section that was advertising a competition to become a Toy Tester. On the poster was a picture of a big fluffy lion. Frances decided she really wanted to meet the fluffy lion and to do so she needed to enter this competition.

She left the Warehouse in tears after we refused to let her enter the competition (you had to spend $30 on toys and submit a video of your child talking about why they’d make a good Toy Tester, which I thought was a bit steep). In the end we came to a compromise: I said we’d make the video and if it was really good then I would go and spend $30 on toys.

The video was good. I bought the toys.

Frances – what did you imagine being a Toy Tester would be like?

I imagined a big fluffy lion would be walking around the house.

And what is the reality of being a Toy Tester?

No big fluffy lion walking around the house. Just testing toys. We had to fly to Auckland to get a photo taken for the New Zealand Women’s Weekly, and me and the other Toy testers held a clipboard and a pencil that wasn’t even sharpened.

What did you have to do for the Woman’s Weekly photo shoot?

We had to hold the clipboards and they had a boy bedroom and a girl bedroom. Just fake bedrooms, like the bed wasn’t real. It had a mattress on top of cartons and pillows and lots of things from the Warehouse everywhere.

Are you enjoying the job?

YES!

What are the prizes?

We get to go to a country. Any country you want. We might go to Japan.

Do you think it will change your life?

Yes because we will buy lots of sushi and castles!

Do you still pick your nose?

…………..

And on that cliff hanger we leave Frances, surrounded by the latest batch of toys that just arrived by courier.

Horse of the Year

August 11, 2013 by Robin

APRA, Children's Music Awards, fleaBITE, Horse of the year, WhatNow

On the last weekend of July, Christchurch hosted two awards ceremonies.

The first was the Children’s Music Awards.

The second was Horse of the Year.

We all stayed at the same hotel.

There was a full size replica of a horse at reception.

As I arrived, a herd of horsey folk trotted out of the conference room and raced down the stairs towards the groaning buffet tables. None of them looked like drivers (these were harness racing awards, so don’t call them ‘riders’). There were many older men, many protruding stomachs, much back slapping and bonhomie. I thumbed through a Harness Racing magazine, which had been placed conspicuously near the hotel entrance.

It wasn’t hard to spot the children’s musicians. A very neat Christian couple with their well-behaved children waiting patiently in the foyer, a couple of rouseabouts yahooing in the corridor, and a pirate with blackened teeth and peacock feathers in his cap. With a sigh I turned my back on the smorgasbord and joined the thinner group.

There were three awards up for grabs on our side of the fence:

APRA Song of the Year (won by Chanelle Davis)

What Now Video of the Year (won by Raymond McGrath)

Recorded Music NZ Best Children’s Album of the Year (won by fleaBITE for CIRCUS OF FLEAS…thank you very much.)

The Children’s Music awards were tacked on to the end of a kids’ talent quest sponsored by Singapore Airlines (and possibly Taylor Swift). While the underage winners grasped their airline tickets to Singapore, or Dunedin (second place), our lot tucked certificates (or in my case a gold statuette!) under their scrawny armpits, and headed out for pizza.

The next morning, over a continental breakfast, my path crossed with one of the horsey brigade.

“Good morning,” I rasped blearily, sprinkling pumpkin seeds onto my fresh fruit.

“Who won Horse of the Year?”

“Terror To Love,” he replied, and leaned past me to order bacon and eggs.

As I lugged my bag down the corridor on the way out, I nodded my regards to the lobby horse, and trotted out to the waiting airport shuttle.

THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT (USA)

July 23, 2013 by Robin

Uncategorized

www.1690wmlb.com/the-kids-are-alright

Amy Handler and her weekly show THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT are off the beaten track of children’s radio.

THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT goes to air every Saturday in Atlanta on 1690 The Voice of the Arts. The station has a reputation for being very liberal, artistic and interesting (just like college radio except that it has advertisers).

I was driven to ask producer/host Amy Handler for an interview when I found out that not only was she a fan of fleaBITE, but she had played the weirder tracks off our CIRCUS OF FLEAS album on her show. She’s also got some fab listening tips for songs and musicians that will give you and the kids a thrill.

You were recommended to us as one of the more open minded and interesting people running a kids’ music show in the USA. What makes your show different?

My show has been going 3 years now.

It is different because it is directly proportional to my personality and interests. It shows off my eclectic taste in music, love of family entertainment, and ideals that all music can be for kids and shouldn’t have to be pedantic or insulting.

It also shows off my obsessive nature in that each show is themed.

I have done things as simple as ‘Summer’ or ‘Valentine’s day’ to ideas that are a bit more way out… banana songs for April Fool’s day (they are the funniest fruit); the King of 8 for Hannukah; songs about orange, gold, and brown for fall; holiday math shows a la an advent calendar; songs about what actual interviewed kids were going to be for Halloween etc.

I sometimes do interviews but they are still done around a theme. Last interview was Tom Angleberger, author of THE STRANGE CASE OF ORIGAMI YODA. Have also had Dr. Seuss’ art director, Mo Willems, Atlanta Clown Care Unit…to name a few.

What got you into doing your show? Do you get paid?

I don’t get paid for my show. But I do get paid when the station’s advertisers sponsor me. I also play parties and festivals and get paid for that. And they pay my parking! But mostly it is a labor of love.

How do you go about putting a show together?

To get ready for my show I gather way more music than I would ever need that over exhausts the subject. And then I peel the layers and arrange/delete in a way that makes sense. I have to make lots of tough love cuts because I only actually have 48 minutes of the hour. I like to make the songs tell a story and fit together in interesting ways. For example this week I was doing a show about shopping for kinds of cars for Father’s Day so one segment had the Batmobile, the Snatzomobile, the Gnome mobile, and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. In another segment I had to cut out The Dead Milkmen’s song ‘Bitchin’ Camaro’ (my younger self rolled my eyes at me for that) due to inappropriateness. But I left the Ramones ‘Go Lil’ Camaro Go’ and Prince’s ‘Little Red Corvette’.

Where do you come across new music for your show?

I get new music sent to me alllll the time. Some of it is super great, but there is lots that is too ‘kiddie’ for my tastes. I still listen to all of it and have discovered some that are standard favorites … the Deedle Deedle Dees, Your Imaginary Friend, Scribble Monster, Lori Henriques, Duke Otherwise…

I also listen to Greasy Kid Stuff (http://greasykidstuff.wordpress.com/about/) and Songs for the Whippersnappers as well as read some of the blogs to keep up on it.

My husband is an obsessive music collector too and he has discovered some of my favorite finds. He trolls WFMU as well as other weird music blogs for inspiration.

And of course I have tons of old records too.

What are some kids’ artists you can recommend?

Other artists I like are Twink, Playsoundz, Jonathan Richman, Petty Booka, anything Muppets, Ella Jenkins, Bruce Hack, Kirby Stone Five, Louis Armstrong. My favorite compilation ever is Rudy’s Rockin’ Kiddie Caravan. Stay Awake is a great one too.

Can we hear your show if we don’t live in the USA?

You should be able to hear my show from anywhere if you go to the website and use their live feed: http://1690wmlb.com/

Or they have free downloadable apps for handheld devices.

What do you think about fleaBITE and Fatcat & Fishface?

I love you guys and play you all the time. Two reasons… one you are silly and unique and the other is you have lots of songs that fit themes. So you are a double threat.

I am about to do a New Music Show… doesn’t have to be actual new music… just music that is new to me, and I will definitely be playing you then and telling everyone how great you are.

Are you crazy?

Do you really have to ask that last question?

Of course I am!

http://1690wmlb.com/the-kids-are-alright/

Twitter: @KidsAlright

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/THE-KIDS-ARE-ALRIGHT/119274024757415

JACK RUSSELL – in dog we trust

July 6, 2013 by Robin

dog breeds, Dogs, Jack Russell, Legacy, random facts

When I become famous, what legacy do I want to leave behind?

Do I want my name attached to a rest home (like Malvina Major), an art gallery (like Gus Fisher), a book shop (Dorothy Butler), a suburban road (Charles Prevost) or a hybrid tea rose (Maggie Barry)?

No. I want my name attached to a dog. Like Jack Russell.

Who was Mr Russell, does anybody know? And what did he do that aligned his name with that short legged, friendly terrier? Did he breed them? Was he rescued by one from a raging torrent after a drunken night that ended with him lying prone in a ditch followed by a heavy downpour?

Mr Doberman and Mr Rottweiler sound like high ranking German officers in starched uniform, barking out orders to the assembled troops. I’m assuming both are male. In fact it’s hard to think of a smiling Mrs Schnauzer, wiping floury hands on her apron as a steaming baked strudel emerges from the oven.

Of course some dogs are named after the place they come from…Chihuahuas, Scottish terriers, Great Danes, Alsatians, Labradors. Or the job they were bred for … Old English sheep dogs, fox terriers, wolf-hounds, bull dogs.

But Pug? What or where is that? It certainly doesn’t sound like a compliment.

And poodling can’t possibly be an activity with merit.

In the meantime, I have succumbed to temptation and checked out the internet to save you the trouble. In 1819 Reverend Jack Russell purchased a small white and tan terrier female named Trump from a milkman. Apparently “Trump was such an animal as Russell had only seen in his dreams … white, with just a patch of dark tan over each eye and ear; whilst a similar dot, not larger than a penny piece, marks the root of the tail “. She was the basis for a breeding program to develop a terrier with high stamina for the hunt as well as the courage and formation to chase out foxes that had gone to ground. By the 1850s, these dogs were recognised as a distinct breed.

So there you have it…I just need to join the clergy, seek out a milkman with an animal that is easy on the eye, and get breeding. Here goes!

Ah yes…record shops. Remember them?

June 19, 2013 by Robin

amplifier, fleaBITE, music distribution, New Zealand music, record shops, slow boat

In my early days in Wellington, Colin Morris Records in Willis Street was the place to go to. Colin himself was impressively knowledgeable and enthusiastic and always willing to take time out for a natter and smile. Slow Boat Records in Cuba St was the other contender, with its acreage of CD and vinyl delights, and crowded countertops of new releases from obscure local bands.

These days, while Slow Boat is still humming along, ‘record shops’ are a both a delight and a rarity. Instead, musicians and composers are forced to rely on the digital realm to showcase and distribute their recorded material.

In New Zealand, the shining star of digital distribution is amplifier. It focuses exclusively on New Zealand artists, promoting and selling on behalf of 1000 odd musicians. Also of special mention, is the high level of customer service. The staff are unfailingly courteous and efficient, another rarity these days.

Richard Setford gives us an insight into the world of amplifier:

Could you give us a bit of history about amplifier…when it started, who was behind it and what the vision was?

In 1999 digital music was in its infancy and there were only a handful of places to source legitimate audio files. We have a Sony MP3 player still sitting on the shelf from the time. It can hold roughly a dozen tracks! Think about how much music you can now put onto your portable hard drive or apple device.

Amplifier was started in 1999 by Chris Hocquard who runs Dominion Law and is still heavily involved. There was really no one in New Zealand who had come at the digital retail side of things in a way that focused on NZ artists at that time. That was the point of difference. And we wanted to make it inclusive. This is a site that allows for any artist – from bedroom strummer to gold selling pop singer – to have a place online that they can populate with their musical offerings, images and thoughts. For many musicians, the path to getting people to hear and then potentially purchase their music can be quite challenging (there are so few record stores now that you can drop in your album to). Amplifier enables artists to create their own page and upload any content they see fit to put out there. We don’t judge the music or the artist; there are no restrictions on the amount of music you upload and no censorship regarding content.

Nowadays people have blogs and there are a multitude of platforms where independent artists can host their music. We’re thankful that our name still means something and new artists are continually adding their profiles to the site. First and foremost we’re an online retail store that specialises in offering audio files (MP3 and now WAV), but I should also say that we continue to offer physical product including merch, books and vinyl. However digital music on the site is outselling physical and growing. It’s a worldwide trend. We ship internationally too. A lot of people are interested in our local artists. Amplifier is one of the first places people will find if they google “New Zealand Music”.

From the outside an organization like amplifier seems like a real going concern. But in the digital age appearances can be deceiving. How big is amplifier in terms of staff? Has it grown much over the years?

We have always been a small operation. Three people at the most will take care of the day to day stuff – sales, artist liaison, customer support, shipping, content etc. There are really only 3 roles. Business Manager (Peter Baker is across sales and finance), Editor (Dan Clist posts news, works the social media side and is in charge of our weekly mailout). Officially I’m referred to as the Music Manager, but that title always seemed a little vague, unofficially I work across ordering stock, data entry, artist support and customer service with a little site maintenance on the side. All our shipping is done out of the Rhythmethod warehouse – that’s where Amplifier currently resides too.

Are you all young cool things?

We are mostly old cool things but we have young heads and good skin.

Where do you think amplifier fits in to the digital music market internationally?

It is but a blip. iTunes is the main player in the digital music world – they account roughly for 80-90% of all digital sales. It’s our niche factor that gives us customer loyalty and a good reach as I’ve mentioned. Orders come in from Japan to Denmark. NZ music has mega fans all over the world.

You are a composer/musician (Bannerman), as well as having a day job at amplifier. How do you think NZ musicians should be looking at a ‘career’ these days? Has that changed?

You can do a lot independently now. The major labels are all converging. If you are Internet savvy then you can create some really good support by being innovative, knowing who your audience is, responding to them, interacting with them. But it’s hard work to constantly promote yourself and of course we all fit in day jobs and personal relationships. Spending some money on radio pluggers and publicity agents is actually essential if you want to gain access to commercial radio, but of course not everyone has money to spend on such things so the alternative is to find support from friends or industry in your area. The NZ Music Commission, APRA and IMNZ are excellent places to go to for advice. Don’t be shy, they exist to keep the industry ticking over. Oh and probably the most important thing….playing live is essential.

Is there any specific thing about amplifier that you are particularly proud of?

The fact that we exist at all is satisfying. I’m proud of our lack of bias. When you can position an independent artist from Hastings who has played a handful of shows and has a collection of bedroom recordings alongside a major label hip hop act, then I think you’re doing something right.

fleaBITE has always found amplifier staff to be exemplary citizens, especially when it comes to communication. I have become so used to bad service that I almost fell over backwards with surprise when emails were answered pronto, and the people I dealt with were motivated, polite and efficient. Is that part of your mission statement, or are you all aiming for a Queen’s Service Medal?

I always think about how I’d want to be treated if I was coming to a company for advice or a service. I think back to when I knew nothing about the industry and was wondering how I could get my music heard. We’re here to assist and we wouldn’t exist without the artists. It’s as simple as that.

Judging the Judges

May 9, 2013 by Robin

Best New Zealand Children's Album, Children's Web Awards, Fatcat and Fishface, fleaBITE, Judging, Judging the Judges, RIANZ

The award for Best New Zealand Children’s Album is being reinstated this year after a twelve year absence.

Fatcat & Fishface were the winners back in 2002 when the award was last offered. As the producer of F&F, I always wondered if we were too weird and wonderful, and that’s why the award was discontinued…?

Now that RIANZ (Recording Industry of NZ) has announced the award is back, I will climb onto my faithful hobby horse to judge the people who judge music for children.

I suppose you could say that in any competition the choice of a winner says more about the judges, and their particular bias, than who actually wins. But there’s an added complication in anything to do with children. While children are the ‘consumers’, they don’t have the means to choose and buy the music themselves, relying on well-meaning parents, offbeat aunties and rockin’ grandparents to buy on their behalf. What’s more, children’s voices are often excluded from the judging process.

Then there is the ‘educative’ criteria that tends to be applied i.e. ‘what’s good for them’ vs ‘what they enjoy’. No other musical genre takes this into account. So what will it be…Playschool or The Simpsons?

In 1999, Fatcat & Fishface entered their first CD ‘HORRIBLE SONGS FOR CHILDREN’ in the USA-based Children’s Web Awards. The cover depicted star of the show Fatcat doing a handstand on the head of pin. The pin skewered long- suffering Fishface to the ground. Half of the award organisers found this image offensive, and wanted to ban us for this alone (they were probably more twitchy than usual because of recent school killings in the USA). They consulted New Zealander Arif Usmani (who produced ‘The Aunties’). He sensibly said that many New Zealanders found American children’s music offensive because it was so saccharine. Thank you Arif.

So the organisers dubbed off copies of the CD without the cover and, lo and behold, the judges (who in this instance were actual children, which was why we had entered these awards in the first place) named Fatcat & Fishface ‘Best New Artist for Older Children’. The adult organisers said, “We all thought NZ was a conservative place. Boy, did we learn something!” Of course, we were oblivious to all this until months later.

My personal theory is that people either have a sense of humour or they don’t. And children are people. We make the music that comes easily to us, and in our case, that music is inventive, theatrical, and a bit edgy. That’s why children and adults like it. And possibly why many gatekeepers do not.

Have a happy day!

FLEA CIRCUSES by Nik Peachey

April 25, 2013 by Robin

Circus of Fleas, flea circus, fleaBITE, fleas, fun facts, Maria Fernanda Cordoso, Nik Peachey

Even as a child I never once thought that a flea circus involved real fleas, so imagine my surprise when I read an article in a British newspaper about a group of performing fleas being denied entry to the UK by customs officers.

Photo from here

The fleas and their trainer, Professor Maria Fernanda Cordoso, had been on their way to perform at the Edinburgh Festival, one of Scotland’s most famous arts festivals, when customs officials decided that the Australian fleas in her troupe were illegal immigrants and would have to be sent back. According to the article, the trainer then had to find other local fleas and train them to perform the same act.

On reading the article I decided to investigate more and discovered that flea circuses have a long history originating in England in the 16th century. They had something of a golden age in the 1830s when L. Bertolotto set up his flea exhibitions in London. His exhibitions featured a flea orchestra playing flea music, fleas playing card games, fleas dancing in dresses and even fleas that could pull miniature coaches! Flea circuses later became a regular feature of carnivals and circus side shows in the US and as late as the mid-1950s there was still a flea circus near Times Square in New York.

Training fleas can be very difficult, but there are a few methods that have proven successful. You can limit the height of their jump, if you put a glass ceiling above them, as they don’t like to bump their heads. There are also chemicals that they don’t like. These can be put on a small ball and put among a group of fleas. The fleas will push the ball away with their legs and give the illusion that they are playing football. Fleas are also very sensitive to heat and light and this can be used to manipulate the fleas to give the appearance that they are well-trained performers. It’s also believed that the flea orchestras of the past were in fact live fleas that were glued to their seats. The majority of fleas in the flea circus are, however, dead. They can be attached to their circus equipment and manipulated with the use of magnets. This has the added benefit that fleas, which have a very short life, then don’t need to be continuously trained and replaced.

So how did something as unlikely as a flea circus become a major event at one of Britain’s most prestigious performing arts festivals? Well Cordoso’s flea act sounds truly incredible, even by circus standards. Her fleas perform in miniature costumes created with the help of Philadelphia’s Fabric Workshop and Museum. They tango, walk tightropes, perform trapeze acts and Brutus the strongest flea on earth is even shown pulling a train. The high point of the performance is the projection of a film which was made using special lenses to magnify the fleas’ feats to huge proportions and features a tribute to the Fearless Alfredo who is shown diving from a great height into a thimble of water and tragically missing. Perhaps even more incredible is the trainer herself. The exotically beautiful Colombian-born Maria Fernanda Cordoso is a sculptor, installation artist and graduate of Yale University. She spent four years researching the lost art of flea training and is now regarded as a world expert. She appears at the performances in a brightly coloured shimmering costume with a magnifying visor and fires flea cannon balls into a tiny flea net. The performance also features the fleas feeding from her bare arm.

Well, if this article has left you itching to find out more, here are some little known facts about fleas:

There is a flea in a Kiev museum that wears horseshoes made of real gold.

A flea can pull up to 160,000 times its own weight.

A flea can jump over 150 times its own size. If a man had the same strength, he could jump over St Paul’s Cathedral.

When jumping, the flea accelerates 50 times faster than the space shuttle.

A flea can jump 30,000 times without a break.

Dead fleas dressed as wedding couples were popular collectors’ items in the 1920s.

Fleas are attracted by carbon dioxide.

Fleas alternate the direction of their jumps.

http://learnenglish.britishcouncil.org/en/magazine-articles/flea-circuses

Forget Me Not

March 1, 2013 by Robin

cats, Ephemeral Art, grieving, memorial, pets, Wobble Te Hau

Even when you are expecting a pet (or person) to pass away, the reality always comes as a shock. They may well be winging their way on to a whole new life in a whole new (and possibly better) dimension, but when they have departed, all the love you have felt for them is translated into grief and loss.

In recent times my beloved feline friend Wobble Te Hau (the Associate Producer of fleaBITE and FATCAT & FISHFACE for 12 fur-filled years) shuffled off this mortal coil. She had been unwell for some months, but even as she grew skinnier and skinnier she remained cheerful, and inhabited her old sunny nooks and mouse-scented crannies.

I have found it very helpful to create in the face of loss. When she became unwell, I planted a garden of yellow and orange marigolds in the shape of a huge smiling cat face as an offering to the God of Ginger Cats. The planting and planning was therapeutic, as was the daily contemplation when watering the ginger-osity. And when Wobble had gone, she was duly wrapped in a favourite towel and buried in one of her favourite garden haunts underneath a lemon tree. I made a little shrine over her grave including a candle protected by a circle of rocks, a little vase of orange flowers, a little felt bird she used to play with, plumage from my mother’s peacock, a cat-nip filled mousie donated by friend’s cat, and I planted the surrounding area to give her a nice view for her new beginnings.

Another garden memorial was conjured a couple of months earlier, when my young nephew’s budgie flew the coop. We made a circle out of feathers poked into earth around a stump, framed it with fig leaves, and wrote the bird’s name ‘Benji’ in flowers, feathers and figlets. Now only the feathers remain, the rest having scattered to the winds. If you are interested, this kind of ‘temporary’ art is called Ephemeral Art – here’s a link to some wonderful ephemeral art images to inspire and get you started: here.

We’d love to see examples of your own animal memorials…it could be a few lines in the sand, petals in the water, a driftwood construction, a sandcastle, or snow creation. Adios.